Happy Birthday Papa and Eddyson!

Today is my father's birthday. The original plan was to celebrate the birthday celebration here at our place but Papa has other plans since his "barkadas" will have a drinking spree on their house. I know papa is happy now with his life along with his new family. I just hope and pray to God that He would give him looooooooooong and healthy life with us.

Today is also Eddyson's 1st birthday. We will celebrate it tomorrow @ Jollibee StarMall.

To the birthday celebrants...God Bless and may the good Lord shower you with overflowing blessings all the rest of your lives...

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On Being Possessive

I really can't get why a friend acts the way she is acting right now. She's being possessive in a way. I can't really get it. We've been friends and been together for almost 2 years now and she would always be a friend to me...but lately she's acting so weird. It seems like she does'nt want me to be close to my new teammates. She wants me to be closer to her than to my gay friend. She feels left out though never in our wildest imagination would we want her to feel that way. It's just I and a gay office mate clicked and whenever we are together - expect no dull moment promise and I am enjoying it! My new found friend is one of my main reasons why I am still here in my current work and if he would leave, I think I would asked to be transferred to another site. I hope and pray that my girl friend would change and stop being jealous. She texted me saying she want's to revive back our friendship but she is acting opposite of what she is saying. She can't get all our attention on her. She needs to grow up!

i am emotera
aning aning suggestions

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Remembering Divina Aban


Today is my bestfriend's 3rd year death anniversary... and I really do miss her terribly. If she was alive up to this day, most likely...she is already working overseas as she plans to be a part of an international shipping cruise and is preparing for it when it all happened. She was diagnosed with Leukemia, a type of cancer that is found on the blood. As she explained her sickness to me before, I've learned that her body is producing more white blod cells than red ones which our body needed. While explaining to me all those medical terms... I can feel from her voice that she does have high hopes of overcoming this deadly disease. She mentioned that what she have is the weakest type of Leukemia that can be healed. I knew she could make it, she is a fighter. We've been friends for almost all our lives. We became friends when we were in our 2nd year high school and since then we never left each other's side. We became rivals when it comes to who will be the salutatorian...she won. Other candidates protest...but not me. I won't and even if given a chance... I will keep silent. I don't want to hurt her and ruin the friendship we've built for almost 3 years at that time. What's surprising is that on her Salutatory speech...she offered her medal to her bestfriend... yup, I heard she offered her medal to me as she spoke my name and that's more than enough honor than being the salutatorian itself. After high school, we still keep in touch. She never forgotten to invite me in their celebrations and I usually attend. Everything goes very well, we even had an outing together a year before she died. We had an overnight swimming in a resort somewhere in Laguna with her bf, my bf and our gay bestfriend Pipa. It was one of the most enjoyable outing I ever attended...never knowing that it would be the last time Vhine would grace us with her presence...

I received a text from another friend, Odette, informing me that Vhine is not feeling well lately and ask me to call because our barkada is at Vhine's place visiting her. At first, I thought it is just a flu or a minor cough and cold kind of sickness...so I called their house and spoke with them. I still does'nt have a hint of what her sickness is...so I just say hi and had a small chitchat with them as I am not at home and is just using one of those payphones in Cubao where me and my mother is strolling.

Then, one day...I received a text from my gay friend informing me that Vhine is diagnosed with a disease called Leukemia. I was bothered. I decided to visit her in the hospital in which she is confined to and I never thought that the damage of her sickness would be severe. She said she lost her hair, her appetite and her strength. We laughed the whole time I was right there and she introduced me to her new boyfriend who never left her despite of what she is going through right now. We laughed and laughed just to forget whats happening and when it's time to bid goodbye...her sister told me that the doctors told them that Vhine does have approximately 4 months to live. I was stuck and at first I did'nt believe it. In my heart and in my mind I know that she can have more than this so I told myself that it's impossible. Vhine is young and active...she would definitely wont let her disease overcome her. I had one chance to visit her at their house, that's the time she explained to me what her disease is all about and how it could be cured. I thought everything is going really well. In fact, she even attended San Juan Fiesta with us not knowing that it would be the last time I would see her (by the way, that was June 24). I never thought she would be gone very soon. I promised to visit her in the hospital but that never materialized because my schedule won't allow me. I, myself, is having a hard time adjusting to a call center life and I am ready to quit anytime. Everything seems to go from bad to worse.

Then one day, it's my off...I am preparing to go to my mother's house in Montalban when I suddenly received a call from one of our common friends informing me that Vhine already gave up. I was shocked. I did'nt know what to do. I was motionless for a moment then I cried out very loud. I hurriedly called my husband and I asked him to immediately ask his manager if he could go home early as I can't manage this alone. He hurriedly went home and off we went to the hospital where she is located and went straight to the embalming area where I saw my bestfriend's body lying naked...cold...lifeless...I don't recall what happened after that. I feel so much grief as if I lost a very dear sister.

I felt embarassed of myself. If I only knew it would be Divine's last days on earth, I should have stayed with her. Assist her and took care of her...but she is gone now, everything's too late. The only way I could make up to her is to be with her on the last days her body would be in the earth. I never left her, I stayed with her hoping that though she is already dead...she could still feel that I love her so much and that I am sorry for not being with her during those tough times.

At her funeral, I was late but I am praying that I could still see her face for the last time... and just like a miracle...I came exactly at the point that the minister would close the coffin. I still manage to utter my last prayer and then we hurriedly went to the place of burial.

I don't know but since then, I feel like everything changed. I started to value friends more and I started to value my own life. Divine is such a strong girl and never in our wildest imagination would we think that she would leave us so soon. I hope this story of mine would touch my every readers heart so that they could give more importance in life. I hope all of us could live each day to the fullest.

To my bestfriend, wherever she is... I hope is is happy. I know that since she lived for others - I know that she is now with the Lord. Till we meet again my friend, please prepare a room for me, neighbor tayo. I love you and you will always be remembered....

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It's Payday!

October 15, 2008
Wednesday, 2:45 PM

Lord thank you again for all the blessings you've given us. Thank you for my job and thank you for all my friends. Jojo fetched me at Munoz and right after I got my salary, we had our weekly grocery @ Waltermart. I also had the chance to deposit some money for our monthly savings. I am also happy that things are working really well for Jojo especially on his online venture. I just hope that our online job would continue and I hope we could be able to save for our future. I was late again last night and I really need to make it up to our coach today so I need to sleep early so I could report for work early tonight. Thank you for all the blessings Lord!

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Oct. 13,2008
Monday 4:08 am

It's my second day off and its a Sunday. Instead of going to church, I spend the rest of the day in front of my computer...finding ways to earn extra online. This has been a routine and I don't know how to stop it. I know that I was'nt able to go to church service for almost 4 years now (since we me and my Jojo lived together). I know it's not good but still, I don't do anything about it. I want to revive back my faith which has been stagnant for 4 years...though I know that I am blessed to know the TRUTH about salvation - I refuse to obey. Lord I pray that you won't give up on me. I know I have'nt been a good daughter to you and bearer of the good news but Lord, I again offer myself to be a living testimony of how great you are and how good you've been to me. I want to touch other's lives again and again feel your presence inside me. I hope it's not too late Lord. I have been a backslider...but here I am again...asking for forgiveness and hoping you'll take me back. I love you Lord, I know I can still make it up to you. Amen.

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Lazy Me!

October 11, 2008
Saturday, 3:05 PM

I've been so lazy. Actually, I together with my sister Mamu planned to have a "gimik" or drinking session right after their shift today. But since I am on a restday...I really had second thoughts about it. Well...yeah, I know. I was the one who set this all up. I even invited everyone in the team and everyone agreed, but I suddenly felt that they are really not that excited on our gimik. My gay friend did not text me and Ice only texted me 3 hours before their shift ends. I actually woke up very early, 5 am because I was so excited to pick what outfit I would wear but here when they are just going with the flow. To my dismay, I just asked them to postpone the gimik. I will just work on my blogs. Anyway, I have my own gimik later...Odette's 29th birthday. Well, actually, I also is not so sure if I can make it or I would again change my mind and just work on my blogs. Well see. Anyways, I've been craving two things today...Coke Zero and Turon. Thanks to my ever loving hubby Jojo who always gives me everything I want. Here is my delicious merienda for the day...yum!

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October 8, 2008

I can't explain what I am feeling today. It's just so happen that a former batchmate, teammate and a friend left the office without saying goodbye to us. We don't even had a clue that he will be resigning. I am talking about our "papang" Pedro Sarcia. We used to call him papang because he is one of the seniors (as in senior citizen) of the team. He is also an ECE graduate like me but the only difference is that he is a licensed ECE! He graduated from CCP, the school where my hubby graduated. We really have a lot in common that's why I felt so sad that he left. Things like this makes me think twice if I would still pursue my plan of sticking with my present employer for three more years especially now that my friends at the office are leaving.

My eyes were opened on the reality that nothing in this world is permanent when my first TL - TL Chrisse was transferred to one of our offices in Bacolod. Then suddenly, my friend and sisterette Ivy followed and went to Dubai. Gherj, one of my closest friends also left to pursure her dream of being a programmer...then Shai, one of my teammates was forced to resign because of her failing scorecards. My batchmates are also planning to leave the company right after we've reached our second year... Julei, Paupau and Niknok (who by the way left already just a few days back) and what's worse...Ice, my closest batchmate and friend at the office is also planning to leave come December together with my gay friend Mamu.

As I mentioned earlier, I dont intend to resign for the next three years because my job pays me well... but with the negative vibes going around the office - I can't help but think twice. I plan to retire three years from now and I intend to have CVG as my last employer before I jump off to another venture which is putting up my own business and be a full time blogger.
Lord, I pray that everything will be OK. Whatever you want to do in my life for your own glory...please make it happen. I trust you and I believe that whatever decisions I may take in the future... I know its all under your will. May you be glorified in everything I do. Amen.

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Christmas Gift for Myself

SEPT. 28, 2008
SUNDAY 9:00 am

God day everyone! We woke up just now because nanood pa si Jojo ng "Walang Tulugan" ni Kuya Germs. Hahaha. Even though I am really not a fan of the show, in fact i have so many subcomments - I enjoy watching it because of Shalala. He (or she) has a segment with German Moreno and they tackle Showbiz intrigues today and even in the past. Shalala is so funny and I would keep on watching "Walang Tulugan" just because of his segment.

Anyways last Friday, I with my gay friend Mamu strolled at Robinsons and we treat ourselves at Teriyaki Boy. Grabe, all we were talking about was boys, boys, boys! We even saw RJ of Pinoy Dream Academy at the restaurant and I was star struck, hahaha! I was shocked to see how he looks because anyone can say that he really looks feminine. No joke. Mamu also said (with his "gay-dar" ON) that he look like one... well, who are we to judge. Maybe he just looks vain and maybe he is really a macho man (in which I doubt, hehehe).
After a hearty lunch, we strolled and looked for a laptop. I would love to buy a laptop this Christmas so I can blog to sawa wherever I am. Instead of going the straight route, my gay friend would go to a direction where there are "cute boys" either walking our direction or those that are in their own stalls. I almost cried in laughter when I catched mamu staring at one of those macho barber cleaning their stall in a barbershop. Hay. I went home at around 4:30 PM and just bought food for Jojo.

My restdays (Saturday and Sunday) was spent where else but at home, doing things for my blog. I intend to spend more time and energy on this money making scheme of mine as Christmas is fast approaching and I am saving for a new laptop. I want the new ASUS laptop, the handy one because I want to bring it along with me especially when I am travelling. I want to keep it on my bag so I can blog whenever there's time. I hope I can save enough for my "christmas present". This is how my new laptop look like...

and here are the specs...

Display 8.9” Display, 1024 x 600 resolution
Color Pearl White, Black
CPU Intel® Mobile CPU
Processor Intel Mobile Chipset
Memory DDR II 1GB
Display Card Intel UMA
Storage 12GB (4GB built-in + 8GB flash) SSD (Microsoft Windows OS Version)
20GB (4GB built-in +16GB flash) SSD (Linux OS Version)
Audio HD audio / built-in speakers
Wireless Built-in 802.11b/g
Camera 1.3M Pixel webcam
Storage Cards SD / MMC (SDHC)
Input / Output 3xUSB / VGA-out (D-Sub, 15pin) / earphone jack / mic / RJ45 10/100 Mbps
Power Output: 12V, 36W;
Input: 100-240V AC, 50/60Hz universal
Operating System Windows XP Home / Linux
Dimensions 22.5cm(W) x 17.0cm(D) x 2cm~3.38cm(H)
Weight 0.99 kg

I really hope God would allow me to buy this through my hard earned money from blogging. I will update you soon! God Bless!

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I stumble upon Joedel's site today and I may say... I really admire him. Why? Because two years ago, in our little cubicle on our previous office where my take home pay would normally evolve around P6,000/month...we had been talking about how happy would it be if we only learn how to make money online and work at home instead of traveling to and fro the office with a salary as little as we are receiving at that time. And now, since Joe resigned from our previous company...things seems to work very fine for him. I've read on his most recent post and he showed all the fruit of his perseverance... after only 6 months after resigning from his previous job and worked full time in his quest to work at home... he was able buy a new car! He said he also was able to help pay for her mother's operation and is now investing his hard earned money on a lot in Tarlac where they will settle with his soon to be wife. What's interesting about this is that Joe is only 23 years old and yet he knows how to handle his money wisely. He is the one who taught me to how to make earn money through blogging and I owe him everything I've learned about this scheme. I just hope and pray I can earn as much as he does. The last time I was able to chat with him... he said he is earning not less than $100/day through online blogging
which is equivalent for what I am receiving in a month's time. Hayyy. I really hope I can find more time blogging so that I could earn more as well and make my family happy also. Need to sleep now for my shift later at 4:00 am... this is the first day we'll gonna handle dsl calls other than home networking... I hope I handle it very well. I'm really inspired to work on my blog because of what Joedel posted on his site... I know I can make it as well. If he can do it, so can I! Aja! Good night everyone!

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Prayer Request


grabe, sobrang tumal ng review offers ngayon. Haaay... I am so worried about my money making experiment that I added a few more blogs so I can submit those again on those paid to post sites. I used to earn at least $10 a day from it because of my PR3 blog, but since google slapped my PR (for 3 of my blogs and left me with one with PR1) ... those review offers I receive are getting less. Well, I think that's a life of on online blogger. Sometimes you got it all, sometimes you're left with none. Actually, I have 2 review offers at hand - one is for $10 (minus 35% commission of the site) and a $5 review (minus commission) offer which would give me a total of barely $10 for both reviews. I am thankful for every blessings I am getting no matter how big or small it is.... I just hope I can find more ways on how to make money online as many people depends on me. My live in partner Jojo does'nt have a regular job right now and is just managing to help me on my online venture. He usually is the one who visits sites and put in comments to help me promote my blogs. He also the "clicker" who clicks on those PTC sites and the survey taker for those survey sites I joined. We are planning to have a home based business but were still on the brainstorming stage right now. I hope and pray that everything would going to be fine for us. I know that my salary is not enough for both of us especially that our transportation expenses eats up most of my salary... I just hope I can find more ways to earn now that I have a "talent" and all the resources for it. I plan to retire after 3 years...I mean, I don't want to work for others anymore. It's either I'll gonna concentrate on my blogging scheme or I'll gonna be an entrepreneur myself... but I thought to myself, how can i do that if the only savings I have in the bank is P1500? Yup, nakakahiya mang aminin, I only have P1,500 in the bank after working for almost 6 years now. That's sad indeed. I hope I can have the will and the drive to save something for my future and I hope and pray God would help me achieve it. I know God knows better than I... there's a greater thing that would happen anytime soon. By faith I pray, amen!

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Finally, Im Back!


well, how long have i parked this blog and never tried posting anything..not even one? hmmm...yeah, it's been 7 months since my last post. As you can see, the first entry shows the feeling of a girl excited about how to live her life, encouraging others to make the most out of it, telling people not to be afraid of showing her true self. It is still my predicament till now... I still believe the since we only live once - we might as well make the right decisions. It's either hit or miss, win or lose, success or failure. I hope I can impart to you how I fight my own life battles and how God help me endure through it all. I've been blogging for sometime now...say, almost five years. I've learned to impart a part of me and was able to gain friendship through it and I hope I can post as honestly as possible on this blog. Welcome and I hope you enjoy your stay!


peeping jojo...


what are you looking at?

i came from the office at around 3:30 am - on our office ( i am working in a call center) - if the volume of calls are not so heavy, they allow their employees to file VGH (Voluntary Go Home)
and they are usually permitted to go home earlier than their usual shift.

I applied for VGH because i want to enjoy my birthday. I will be turning 28 this February 22nd and I definitely want to enjoy it. So after my good friend Gherj treat me out for early morning breakfast - off I went home and had a nice time with my boyfriend Jojo.

We cooked "pinakbet" - i want to eat healthy foods from now on as I am not getting any younger - and while waiting for the meal to cook - I took a picture of him on our living room. It's kind'a  funny... it's like he is looking for something outside but he is afraid of being caught....

the whole day was spent in bed.... the breeze is so cold and it's the best time to rest. Tomorrow - I know Ill gonna be busy... will update you as to where and how I celebrated my birthday...

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I know I told you on my last post that I will think of a topic to use for this blog and will just post it the tomorrow...unfortunately it took me almost 25 days before I can think of something....and you can't believe what I think I need to do for this blog....

I think I want to use this as my online diary...well, is'nt it kind'a usual? Usually you blog because you want to pour out your feelings, you want to take note of what your views are about a certain topic, or you just want to blog about something. Well, that's what I intend to do with this blog. I want to be as personal as possible so I don't think I can use this for my online blog reviews. Anyway, it's ok...let my other blogs serve that purpose.

Thank you for visiting... I intend not to inform my friends that a blog of mine like this do exists. I don't want them to know everything about me. I don't want them to know what I feel about a certain thing or a certain person...I just created this blog to have an outlet...to take note of my frustations...happiness...fears....excitement....

Thank you for reading this...I don't expect you to continue to read but if you want to hold on and read anyway...you're always welcome to drop by....



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to be honest with you...i really don't know what the concept of this blog will be. still don't have any idea after 10 minutes of staring on the computer monitor. Hay, my head aches na talaga. After posting 2 reviews from my sponsors at i am emotera - i feel i am really tired and exhausted na. Maybe I will have a better idea tomorrow after going home from the office. I still have my shift at 9 pm today pa kasi so I think I need to rest na. Lord, please let it be clear to me how will I go about writing stuff for this blog. To you be the glory forever. Amen. Till tomorrow!